Rejected. Turned down. Dismissed. All of these words make up the cold, harsh, and gawky “I don’t like you” reality. But most people wonder—what’s tougher, being the rejecter or the rejected?
21st century teens have a cop-out when it comes to breaking up or rejecting each other that groovy adolescents sixty years ago did not have—the cell phone. Most awkward “it’s not you, it’s me” conversations are shared not over chocolate milkshakes and chunky jukeboxes anymore, but rather over cellular data and warm radiation.
Something did, however, carry over from era to era—the sting of romantic rejection.
The Rejecter. Rejecters come in many forms: boys or girls, players or amateurs…But what most people do not realize is that playing the sharp-clawed and pointy toothed role of the rejected can be just as excruciating as landing the puppy-dog eyes look of the rejected. Whether the rejecter is a boy or a girl, both genders sum up the tough conversation in one scholarly statement: “it sucks.” But in many young relationships, as Shakespeare said, “The wheel [has] come full circle” and the time for heartbreaking may be inevitable. And although it can seem like a painful (not to mention, uncomfortable)“help me” moment for the rejecter, he/she has to realize that in the long run both sides will feel relieved and eventually, move on.
The Rejected. Even though both people in any romantic relationship can be universes (or even GALAXIES) apart from each other, the pair can very well share the same feelings as the role of the rejected. Whether it is the stinging “Why me?” or the flaming “I hate you and I never want to see you again” conversation, ultimately the rejected feels foolish and caught off guard. But instead of hosting a pity party with his/her BFFs—Ben and Jerry and brownies galore—the rejected has to focus on the positives. And instead of nauseatingly pondering over what he/she could have done to fix the relationship, the rejected has to come to terms with the cliché statement, “Everything happens for a reason.”
Both sides of rejection bring equally as tough predicaments and feelings. But, rather than taking the role of the serpent rejecter or the glossy-eyed rejected, teens should try to side-sweep both and grab the leads as heroes who are only trying to salvage their feelings for future, successful relationships.